


End of an Era

by literallywhat



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M, HAPPY ENDING!!, M/M, bell and o's mom is still alive, bellamy and murphy used to have a band, bellamy is gay af, hint to underaged sex, light descriptions of abuse, murphy's dad is already dead, so is murphy, trigger warning alcohol and abuse, trigger warning drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-08-09 12:24:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7801777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literallywhat/pseuds/literallywhat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After school ended, we were waiting for my mom to pick us up. We were standing outside, and I felt it was the right time to make my move. I didn't feel anything special towards him, I just knew he was going to be in my life forever, so I kissed him. Our noses clashed roughly and my marker-coated hands left prints on his face. I pulled away and looked at him.<br/>"Why did you do that?" His eyes were wide.<br/>"Your lips feel like a fish."</p>
            </blockquote>





	End of an Era

"Stop moving. I saw my mommy do this a bunch of times." I spoke. I had a slight lisp at the time. I was missing a front tooth. Octavia asked what my mom was doing with the weird metal near her face, and my mom would always respond with “making myself pretty.”

"You're gonna hurt me." Murphy’s bottom lip jutted out and his eyes began to water.

"Sh," I pushed him down on the edge of the bathtub. I pulled the tweezers that I stole from my mom's bedroom and held them to his face. "I'm just making you pretty, John." At that point in his life, he allowed people to refer to him as ‘John’.

"I'm already pretty, Bellamy!" He slapped my hand away, which led to me slicing his skin with the tweezers. It wasn't bad, but since we were both five, a little bit of blood was a huge deal.

I started crying first. He only started when he realized what happened. I was too afraid of getting in trouble, so I covered his mouth. "Be quiet...my mommy’s home and I'll get in trouble."

"I'm dying, Bellamy!" Picture a five year old, panicked, crying the name ‘Bellamy’…it didn’t come out too clear.

Thinking on my feet like the smart older kid I was, I got some toilet paper and stuck it in between his eyebrows where the cut was. "My mommy does this when she gets cut on her legs."

"I need to go to the hospital!"

Then we heard a knock at the door.

"John, Bell? You guys okay?" My mom spoke softly.

"Yeah! We're just playing in the bath." I put my hand in the toilet and splashed the water around for sound effect.

"Ew!" Murphy hissed.

The door opened and my mom walked in. She walked into a room with my hand in the toilet, toilet paper stuck to Murphy’s forehead, and Murphy crying.

 -

"But we have school tomorrow, and I already don't have one of my tooths." I frowned, closing my toy chest, and sat on it, that way he couldn't play with anything.

"You gave me a scar," he pointed to the almost completely faded scratch I gave him a few days prior. "So now I get to hurt you."

My eyes widened and I almost began sobbing when he pulled the 'best friend card'.

"Fine. Take out my tooth, but I'm gonna be really mad at you." I crossed my arms, really hoping that threat would deter him from what he was about to do. It didn't.

Next thing I knew, his sticky fingers were in my mouth, then they weren't. I screamed and pushed him as my mouth poured with blood.

"That hurt!" I wiped my mouth, blood still coming out.

His eyes widened and he began sobbing, still holding my tooth. My mom ran in the room with eyes almost as wide as Murphy’s.

“What happened?” Then she noticed the blood, and then she noticed the tooth. “Honey!” She yelled down the hall. My mother scooped Murphy up, sitting down with him, while my dad ran in and held me.

“Well what happened here?” There was a twinge of laughter in his voice.

“He pulled my tooth out!” I yelled through my sobs, now competing with Murphy’s. My mom began saying something about responsibility to Murphy, but I ignored it and spit blood onto him.

“Bellamy!” My dad hit my arm lightly. “No spitting.”

My mom wiped Murphy’s face off with the bottom of her shirt.

“I want my daddy.” I don’t think any room has ever been that quiet. Neither of us really grasped the fact that ‘dead’ means ‘gone forever’.

“Daddy’s not here…” My own mother’s eyes were sad.

I wiggled out of my dad’s grip and grabbed his hand, snot dripping down my face. “I’ll take you to your daddy.”

“No, Bell.” My dad pulled me back, I stumbled a little.

“I’m a big boy I can walk him home. It’s what gentlemans do.”

“No, baby, it’s not that, it’s-"

“I’ll take him home, darling.” My mom spoke, picking Murphy up. "You wash his mouth out with saltwater.” At the time I thought it was a punishment, but I later realized it was something to do with the blood or whatever.

 

The first day of kindergarten was cool. I thought the missing two front teeth was going to be a problem, but some kids were jealous that I lost two and they hadn't even lost one. They asked if the tooth fairy visited me, and I told them she gave me a billion dollars. I was automatically liked.

Murphy didn't make many friends at first, but I was practically glued to his side, so anyone who spoke to me had to deal with him too. But, that was kindergarten. It was easy to be cool.

After school ended, we were waiting for my mom to pick us up. We were standing outside, and I felt it was the right time to make my move. I didn't feel anything special towards him, I just knew he was going to be in my life forever, so I kissed him. Our noses clashed roughly and my marker-coated hands left prints on his face. I pulled away and looked at him.

"Why did you do that?" His eyes were wide.

"Your lips feel like a fish."

My mom pulled up and I, as the gentleman I was, opened the door for my new boyfriend. He didn't know it, but we were dating and on a quick road to marriage.

He sat to my left, and we both stared forward. Neither of us really knew what a kiss was, we just knew it was very serious. Something that only grown ups do.

Still looking forward, I asked "Can I hold your hand?"

I received a simple reply of "No."

"Okay."

I think my mom smiled, I kind of remember her looking at us through the rear view mirror.

 

Murphy didn't want to hang out with me anymore, but his mom would always drop him off anyway. We were eating cereal, Lucky Charms, and we were both kicking our feet, because they couldn't reach the floor. I went to put my hand on his, as I had seen my dad do before, and he retracted immediately, tipping his bowl over slightly, some cereal and milk sloshing out.

"You’re a boy. Don't touch me."

"Boys can hold hands.” I frowned.

"You kids getting along?" My dad walked over, he had the video camera out.

"No." He crossed his arms.

"I think we're just going through a rough patch in our marriage."

I remember his eyes widening at that.

"We're not married! You're gross!"

My dad laughed and continued to record us as we fought back and forth. There was a lot of 'we kissed so we're married' and 'we’re both boys!’ and 'I'm not ready to be a daddy’s’.

The day ended in an official divorce. Signed in crayon.

- 

"Our next song should start with-" my voice cracked. I touched my throat as Murphy laughed.

"Did you just hear your voice?"

"Do you remember your unibrow?" I threw the notebook I was holding at him.

"Bell! I couldn't control that."

"And I can't control my voice. Besides, I tried to help you get rid of it but you fucked it up." Curse words tasted weird, and they were always said softly so my parents wouldn't hear. "And then your revenge got all the kids in kindergarten to like me." I smirked, glad that I won that battle and grateful that my lisp was gone.

"Yeah, but how many friends do you have now?" He had a devious smile on his face. Not the first time I saw it, and definitely not the last.

- 

 We used to have sleep overs, when we were really young, but since we were in our double digits, his mom decided he needed to spend the nights at home—most likely to take care of her drunken self. So we came up with a plan. He would sneak in from his room into my room through our windows. My dad asked why I always kept it open, I feel like he knew.

Then things took a serious turn. Things got really bad with his mother. Worse than when we were kids. He’d come to my house for safety. He’d either have bruises, cuts, red marks, usually all three, and dried tears. It was hard seeing him like that, but there was nothing I could do except to keep my window open.

- 

"Bell?" I heard Murphy’s voice over the sound of Rachel and Ross fighting about whatever on the TV. I was laying down and he was sitting up.

"Yeah?"

"What's in your pants?" He said, failing to stifle a laugh.

I sat up on my elbows and looked down, in horror, to my penis standing proudly through my pajama pants. I pulled a pillow over my crotch.

"John. You have to go home."

After a minute of arguing, he left, and I fixed my situation. I wondered if he saw me through his window.

- 

The next week or so, I got the news my dad died. I didn't cry in front of my mom or sister, I couldn't. So I called Murphy over, and once we got into my room, I collapsed into his arms and sobbed. I think that's the first time I've ever broken down in front of someone. I think I've only ever broken down in front of him.

Murphy was good. He held me on my bed as I cried. I got snot all over his shirt, which I expected him to yell at me after the shock was over. The wake and the funeral were weird. So many of my dad's friends came and they all recognized me. I didn't know them. They thought Murphy was my boyfriend with how close we were the whole time, so there were a lot of gross looks exchanged between the two of us. My mom cried the whole time. She refused to leave his casket. I think she would have if Murphy’s mom was conscious enough to show up. They were best friends, and she always knew how to make things okay, my mom would always tell me that. But then she got into drinking, after Murphy’s father died. I always silently prayed that Murphy wouldn’t turn into a fuck up…he didn’t turn into a fuck up, but he did fuck things up, I guess.

The day after the funeral was the last time Murphy and I hung out for five years. It was awkward. We were both awkward. Shaking hands, confusion, neither of us knew what to do. I was sweaty, from nerves not from the act itself. I don't think either of us really came. I know he didn't. I knew he was doing it because he felt bad for me. I wanted to feel closer to him, but after that day I never felt further apart. We stopped talking. Such an intimate thing at such a young age, something that we didn’t even know worked for two people of the same sex...neither of us knew what to do. Neither of us even had friends, so we were friendless for a bit.

Soon, I migrated into the popular rich kids, thanks to my good looks. Murphy was always scowling, he looked angry all the time, but the dirt bag kids soon adopted him. He was willing to try anything. They liked that. They started calling him ‘Murphy’, and soon ‘John’ was just an old forgotten friend.

- 

Senior year. I still had the habit of keeping my window open all the time, even when it was cold out. Murphy had lost some—well a lot—of weight due to the cocaine his lovely group of friends got him into. So I never really expected him to crawl into my bedroom in the middle of a winter night, but he did.

I was asleep, finally after crashing from my intense study session with Clarke, when I felt a slight pressure on my bed and a voice in my ear. Murphy was in my room. The last time I saw him in my room he was naked. He was bruised and bloody and crying. My heart broke. But of course I wasn't going to show it. I was angry. A gentle anger. Questions like "why did you come to me" and "why at this time". I knew the answers.

After that night, whenever things got really bad with his mom, he would come over and stay the night. I didn't mind. It was nice to have something warm next to me while I slept. But we still went about our daily routines in which we hated each other and tortured each other in school. My friends hated his friends, and his friends hated my friends.

I'm not really sure the order of everything else, it all happened so fast, but he eventually started hanging around my house a lot, like my mom would have if she didn't have two children to take care of on her own and work a fulltime job, or how my mom would describe Murphy’s mom, pre alcohol. Kinda always there, even when uninvited, but always welcome. But Murphy fucked things up.

He fucked things up with me and Raven...well I did, but it was easy to blame him. He tried to back out of my life, I didn’t want him to, but I let him eventually.

 -

I stopped dating—well fucking—Raven, but Murphy got a girlfriend. Emori. She was from out of town, really hot and sweet. But she had a dark side, one that drew Murphy in. Cocaine. The white snow that fell all year round for them. Murphy seemed very happy. He was smiling in the beginning, but he soon was found often asleep with dark bags under his eyes. He was out every night drinking or getting high with his new girlfriend.

- 

Somewhere along the line, he stopped coke and stopped dating Emori. Somewhere along the line he started dating me. Somewhere along the line, I got into college, and I was gone. I was still his and he was still mine, but I was gone.

Somewhere along the line, Murphy relapsed. But after a few, long FaceTime calls, and many tears, he promised to never touch the substance again.

- 

Octavia was in a sorority in the college she was going to, which I greatly disapproved of, but she joined regardless. With help from her 'sisters' or whatever the fuck they were called, I proposed to Murphy. Yeah, yeah we were too young and yeah maybe it was too soon, but it felt right, and I'd never been happier than when he said yes--well, he said it was the worst proposal ever as I cried but he let me put the ring on his finger and we kissed, so I took it as a yes.

I asked his mother for permission. She wasn’t too sober, but she was conscious, so she gave me her blessing. I know his dad would have said yes, but since he was dead, and it was going to be a gay wedding, I decided to do something at least a little traditional.

-

Then he was in the hospital. His mother had beaten him to the point of unconsciousness. I stayed at his side everyday in the hospital. I waited until the day he would open his eyes. His hospital gown was white. Beautiful on his skin, beautiful with the ring. They took it off for tests, but I put it back on. His mom really fucked him up. She was in jail. I knew she felt guilty. She should have.

- 

Black never looked better on him, and the same black never looked better on me. There weren't many people. His family was never close--but neither was mine. His mother wasn't present, that was bittersweet. She didn't deserve to be there, but he deserved to have his mother there.

I was sweating, I felt bile in my throat. All feelings, all memories, they all came flooding back to me in that moment. In the moment of looking at Murphy, my beautiful Murphy in his black tux, holding his hands, him laughing at me because I was crying. I didn't think he was ever going to wake up, or at least wake up being normal after his mother hurt him. I'd never seen someone so destroyed before. And in that moment, I had never seen anyone more beautiful.

"Hey, Bell?" His voice was gentle as he leaned on my shoulder.

"Yeah?"

"Now we're married, and I'll sign it in crayon."

**Author's Note:**

> as per usual, i wrote this for a different fandom at first, so i just had to swap the gender of some and change the names and situations. i finally have a story that ended happy!!! like happy, happy.  
> please leave me comments telling me on what i can improve on/more ideas, and kudos would be very nice ty.  
> my tumblr is arrange-me, it's a mess if u ever wanna check it out.  
> thanks for reading! ily


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